A Preview of Things to Come

I may try a bit later to write this whole post, but I just have one thought I want to share first. I will grant you that there are some crazy-ass women out there. Women who will move a relationship at warp speed (at least in their own heads), and be stereotypically clingy and hyper-emotive a la "crazy Andy" in "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days", and then wonder what they did to scare the guy off. I am not one of those women. However, a perfectly sane and normally together woman can be driven a little nutty when a man who has previously called her "the perfect woman", later doesn't call her at all. When he appears to be interested and mature at first, and then disappears without any sort of explanation or notice. So guys, if this sounds like you, don't put the blame for your failure on our "crazy", because it was self-inflicted. You have no one to blame but yourself, and if you can't be mature enough to tell a woman to her face that you don't want to continue seeing her, you probably don't deserve her.

Who caught JR?

Hi there.

I have an eHarmony-related post that's been in "editing" since I started it in November, but that's not what I want to talk about. Honestly, this post isn't exactly what I want to talk about either, but I'm going to take care of it first.

So, about a month and a half ago, JR and I decided to get together. I'm pretty sure it was his idea, since I've pretty much given up initiating contact with him, except on his birthday. We both had Veteran's Day off from work, so we decided to get lunch at a new beer garden on the Upper Upper West Side. I got there first, ordered a pink beer, and then he showed up and we ordered food. We were just talking, catching up on life as it goes, when he mentioned that he is now engaged. He popped the question to his girl Sally on the High Line, just before it closed. I'm sure it was nice. The ring is lovely, as he has money and good taste. I've met Sally twice, really only talked to her on one of those occasions, but she's nice enough, has a good career, and seems grounded and sure of herself. She's pretty, but I like to think I'm prettier. Which is neither here nor there.

Now, some of you may worry that I was extremely upset. Let me try to allay your concerns. One, I had just had a fabulous first date the night before with a guy I was really starting to like (this is part of a post that I want to write, but not sure I'd get it right just yet). This really helped to take the sting out of it, because I was blithely thinking that I might be on the same road, just a bit behind. Two, JR moved in with Sally only a few months after they started going out, I didn't hear anything negative about her from him, and a mutual friend predicted they'd get engaged, thus I was fairly well mentally prepared. Anyway, I wasn't so much upset that he was engaged, as I do want him to be happy, it was more the fact that he got there before me. Karma was at least supposed to give me that nod, no? That he would have to sit there feeling heartsick as he watched me marry the man of my dreams, wishing that it was him. I feel like I deserve at least that small satisfaction. So as I'm already on the handmade cutesy photo-Christmas-card list, and I'm one of the few friends from college JR is in regular touch with, I know I'll be invited to the wedding. All I can say is that if I am not dating anyone at the time of the blessed event (which let's face it, given my track record, is most probable), that Vittoria will have to be my date, and she will have to get drunk with me, because as mature as I am right now, I'm not sure that my resolve will hold in person.

Maybe I'll have more to say on this the closer we get to it.